abc's

a) yes, actually.... i DID just arrive home after a long and kind of tretchurous day at work, followed by an hour spent in the grocery store, and lock my keys in my car.... WITH said groceries stuck inside. yup. that's me. i did that... just now. nice. BUT... it's 3am, and im certainly not paying premium prices to get those keys out now! the groceries will be fine... they'll be waiting there for me tomorrow... at least they have my keys inside to keep them company.

b) after spending a good ten minutes throwing the top of her head into my chest to give hugs and to get lovins, bristol anne has now climbed under the covers and is kissing my toe.

c) i finally said once and for all that i just couldn't do the wedding (that i'd mentioned a few days ago), and my friend responded by telling me how disappointing that was. all i could say was i am sorry. i feel really bad. i hope one day, even if it's far from now, she will understand.

d) i learned today that mike's sister natalie has started breathing a bit better on her own, but she's not off the respirator completely. AND her kidney started to work correctly. progress is progress, and im thankful it's been a positive day for he and his family. never the less- continue to pray!

e) i was thinking tonight about how id really like to buy a nice camera and start taking pictures. that sounds so fun. will undoubtedly never happen (at least not anytime in the near future...) but it's a thought, and i figured id share.

f) got to talk to josh tonight. he cheers me up. there's something to be said for a bestie. we just "click." always have kind of... not many people really understand our connection. but that's ok- we do. and it brings each of us comfort and joy when we need it most.

g) also got to talk to rhonda today. she's moving to new mexico! kind of exciting stuff!

h) sometimes (even when you don't think you've done anything wrong) it's best to just say "im sorry." this avoids drama. ive definitely learned that recently.

i) tomorrow's my last work day for the week- which means the weekend is looming. im already dreading it. but i think ive got something scheduled for friday during the day at least... so that eliminates one whole day of sitting alone in my little bedroom. i really hope it works out cause it's with what seems to be a really fun girl ive wanted to get to know for awhile.

j) i heard from michelle today on facebook. she said my little baby is talking a lot these days... i just can't imagine. last time we chatted she put sophie on the phone. when i said "hi sophie!" she promptly responded and said "hi!" and then i said "awww, i love you sophie." and she said "i wuv you too." to me it was clear as day. it melted my heart. i miss her so much! she said jenna claire is just as sassy as ever, and that rossi p got glasses! im sad to be missing the goings on of their daily lives. i wish i could squeeze them right this minute.

k) i think my mom might come out for a visit in march. this makes me happy. i love her.

l) have you ever met someone who just doesn't know when to stop talking? yeah- i work with one of those, and quite frankly he is exhausting!

m) i need to remember to call my insurance company tomorrow (right AFTER i call a locksmith...) to see about my insurance card. it never arrived... and i am really anxious to see a dermatologist. i want perfect skin.

n) update on the nail sticky on thingys i mentioned earlier this week- they are staying on like a champ. and im getting lotsa compliments on them.

o) tonight i made a girl mad at work. she said i was a bitch. this bothered me a little, but not much. i know im not a bitch. but ya know what? at the end of the shift, i waited for her and i walked right up and apologized for making her think i was a rude bitch, and explained that was really never my intention. i think this surprised her a little. see? im an adult. and i think it's a bit more effective to speak to the person about it, rather than going behind their back and name calling. what is this? 7th grade? anyway... i said sorry, and i think she felt bad. and then i left. see? sometimes it IS just best to apologize... that should be my new motto! "when all else fails? just say you're sorry!"

p) has anyone else ever had one of those nights where they lay in bed, and it feels like you hafta really try to make the muscles in your body relax? i usually feel that way after work... i think it's from standing so much.

q) have i ever mentioned that alison krause is like my all time FAVE? her voice is like butter.

r) before leaving nashville bristol was so thin! not even 50 lbs! i think it was because she sensed all of the stress around her. she is really intuitive like that. well, im happy to report that NOW.... she is looking fabulous! you can't even see one rib! it's cause i feed her twice a day like 2-3 cups of puppy chow.

s) i need a pedicure something awful!

t) i got post cards for my besties in nashville today. i think if i were a kid, it'd be really fun to get post cards from colorado... you?

u) i think i might move back to nashville. it is home... not this... not here. ive really felt this way for awhile, but feel really ashamed and stupid for leaving in the first place. feels like just another failure to add to the list. oh well. something great about being a "party of 1" is that i get to decide where i should be. just me! and no one else.

v) i will say though, that being in colorado has in some ways been good for me. i think it gave me the clearly defined "break" i needed from eric. had i stayed in nashville this whole time, my assumption is that i would have more than likely continued seeing him on a regular basis, as i did before leaving. this would have made it impossible to feel okay with the circumstances. i needed the time just away to deal. i needed it to get perspective. i needed it to realize i really am okay without him. so yeah- while i don't think i want colorado long term... i can see how and why it benefited me in this way. and that is good.

w) maryellen willis always sounded better than maryellen adams anyway, huh?

x) i wish i had uggs. i want the black ones that are made of sweater material, and have really cute, big buttons on the sides. too bad they're so stupid expensive. and too bad im broke. oh well.

y) i kinda get annoyed with people who in friendships are just all about taking. take. take. take. i. i. i. me. me. me. ive been known to be the notorious giver to a fault. im the "yes" girl. im always there. and it seems that when I am the one who ends up needing the friend, my friends don't know how to react... it's like theyre not used to that. well- not all of them... but some. and that's awkward.

z) now i plan to go and see if last night's episode of parenthood or teen mom 2 is online yet.... i can't wait!

be blessed friends, and as always- be thankful.